Depending on your cellphone provider, you can expect coverage in the U.S. anywhere between 95% and 99% of the time. My carrier, T-Mobile, claims 96% coverage. Of course, this assumes you’re in a place where people actually live or visit.

I haven’t sent any of my children on a wilderness expedition (not recently, anyway, and we had no choice). And even though I have a son named Daniel, our last name isn’t Boone. So how is it that my kids don’t have a cell signal when I need to speak to them the most? Or lose their signal at the most critical point in the conversation?

Any of these sound familiar?

“I know I was supposed to be home at 1:00, but the AAA guy … shoulder on the highway … can’t hear you … ”

“Hi Dad … I’m okay … What was that officer? … Dad…Dad?

Dad, I’m in line at (insert trendy store name here) and … on sale today only … credit card … pay you back … hello?

Of course the cell signal seems to be fast and reliable when binge watching Breaking Bad or streaming Breaking Benjamin, but my conversations are always breaking up. And how is it that EVERY Amazon transaction seems to go through the first time?